Combined University Retreat (CUR) 2022

Before CUR, I would describe the season that I was in as one of spiritual numbness. My life was a pursuit of many earthly desires and I took priority in them instead of spending time with God. When my finals ended, all the “work” I had done for my community and service to God during the semester, led me to think that I deserved this break and it is now my turn to have freedom in living out my desires. When I was approached to take on the role of Intercessory IC for CUR, I was hesitant as my selfish desires consumed me. Lies filled my head, telling me that I was too inexperienced for the role, I wasn’t good at praying and I'm not worthy enough to pray for others. As I sat in prayer, a small voice echoed, “why do you fear and doubt me, my child?”. Upon hearing this, my heart ached as I came to realise my lack of trust and faith in the Lord. But I was also reminded of the Lord’s faithfulness over my life and how He never abandons me in the darkness and qualifies me. This led me to give my simple “yes” to the Lord and I desired to place my hope and trust in His ways for me.

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However, while planning and prepping for Intercessory for CUR, so many times I wavered in my faith and lost sight of Jesus, like St. Peter faltering on the stormy seas. I felt inadequate of my abilities to lead Intercessory as I grew uncomfortable with the Lord stretching my heart and leading me into deeper waters. I started to silently regretted my “yes” as I knew someone else would have been more suitable for the role than me. In my despair and weakness, I desired to rely on God’s strength and His providence to carry me through these uncharted waters. When fears and doubts arose in me, I was reminded to turn my eyes towards God and He gave me the spirit of confidence to sing in front of others, a heart full of conviction to proclaim about His goodness, and boldness to lead others in prayer. I was also blessed by God in many ways as He generously sent people my way to affirm me, remind me to protect my relationship with God, and to guard my heart through prayer and scripture readings.
In my experience serving in CUR and as an intercessor, God opened my eyes to see the beauty of prayer and interceding for others. He expanded my heart to not look on my desires anymore, but on the desires of others and most importantly God’s desires! He dispelled the lie that the Holy Spirit was absent in guiding me whenever I prayed for others and gave me the courage to share my gifts with others. He planted a small seed of faith and a desire in me to bring others to Christ, which allowed His Spirit, who dwells in my heart, to work through me to pave a way for my salvation and the salvation of others! As I intercede for others, I also become increasingly aware of God’s presence in my life and His unwavering love and mercies for us. I claim the truth that He is a faithful Father who will not let me down or disappoint me! PTL for this new season of learning to rely upon and trust in His Spirit, renewed sight and experiencing the joy of serving him! :)
So, my dear brothers and sisters, will you allow the Spirit of God, which dwells in your heart, to lead you to deeper waters with God, and work through you and in you for God?

Chloe Yong